Thursday

I should really get out more.

I was standing naked in the bathroom shaving my head when I thought ' this is just a little too "Taxi Driver" for me'.  But how does one stop mid-shave?  At my age -rather than appear neo-punk hardcore fashion victim - kabuki would appear more to have  suffered an unfortunate accident with a weed whacker.  And while kabuki doesn't mind  appearing completely insane - kabuki really had no where to go. Another desperate look wasted.  I could dash off to the pet store - but really - when was the last time you startled an iguana?  It is not so very rewarding.  All the little fishies do is swim and poop, totally boring.  Since it is approximately 105 degrees with unbelievable humidity outside - anyone wandering around downtown Winchester is probably certifiable anyway.  kabuki refuses to waste perfect good crazy looks on insane people.  What's the point?  What's my point?  The point is this - kabuki has to get the hell out of this one horse town. Go west- that's what they keep saying.  Felix wants me in Palm Springs. I think he wants to kill me, then bury me in the desert.  But he is so busy - when would he find the time.  Meanwhile kabuki is looking into tricking out a golf cart and selling sno-cones in front of the local strip mall. Another dear friend has offered Albaquerque, but kabuki can't even spell that one.  And what of the scorpions.  You know between the heat and the excess drugs dropped by desert smugglers the scorpions are not right in their little scorpion heads.  Can't you just see kabuki picking off the little crazy scorpions with a 9mm semi-automatic?  The patio would be a bunch of broken tiles, spent shells, and scorpion carcasses.  Although honestly - there wouldn't be much left of the little buggers, cuz kabuki favors hollowpoints as ammo of choice.  One can hardly host a barbeque among broken patio tiles and spent shell casings.  At least it would keep the neighbors out of my reflecting pool.  Because kabuki will need a rerlecting pool.  To sit next to as I pen my memoirs.  So i better get busy making memories - so let me dash.  kisseys to all  

6 comments:

  1. I would offer you sanctuary in Canada but our reflecting pools ice over.

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  2. Since you already got a 9 sillymeter, don't you see it's got to be Palm Springs.

    We could re-enact the glorious first evening that Frank Sinatra and Ava Gardner spent in each others company where they drove to the outskirts of the Springs, parked, made out, and took the gun out of Frank's glove compartment and shot out street lights.

    I get to be Ava.

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  3. Sweetie, I hate to break this to you, but if heat is your problem, Palm Springs in July is not your answer. Even the lesbians and scorpions are overwhelmed.

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  4. Dammit, my comments are still disappearing.

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  5. i don't think you're right about felix wanting to kill you (#!), then bury you in the desert (#2). he could easily do number two without bothering to do number one, which would naturally occur after number two. so relax.

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